Dad still says that no one in our family will ever be good enough to make it to the Olympics. He does not understand how much I want to go though. That is all I wanna do. I am sick of his lack of confidence in me. I should just rebel against him forever I swear....

I cried my eyes out tonight.
My parents don't believe in me anymore. They do this to me sometimes. They told me that I can't be a horse trainer if I keep going like I am. Dad says that I should be practicing at least 5-6 times a week and Carol should be coming out a whole bunch more than she is. But I don't really have time now. I don't know if I should quit tennis and piano. I hate being a quitter.

I also don't understand my school loneliness. Apparently nobody wants to hang out with me because I am not cool. I need more attention. All I want is more friends. Thats practically what I live for at ODA. But the thing is that everyone has their own little group of people that they prefer. Even when i stand right there in there face they still choose not to say "hey you want to come hang out with us when we go?" People just don't think like that at ODA. Its a self-centered thing they have and it hurts my feelings.

But no one likes me anyway because I am not a rich stuck-up kid.